The overwhelming winner is ... Sulla's "Raven"!
Here is the winning piece
Once upon a browser dreary, while I burrowed, blitzed and bleary
Into many a faint and furious posting from some ill-begotten bore,
Suddenly there came an inkling, and I found my eyebrows wrinkling,
Like some Yorkie, softly tinkling on a cold, unpapered floor.
I clicked on a destination I had ne'er been to before;
Right-wing websites need me more.
Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in my quest for tenure,
That had launched my trip to Ragnarok in nineteen ninety-four.
I've compiled a list of people - some are villains, some just sheeple -
Who derailed my lifetime gravy train; and that is why I'm poor.
I should be an honored scholar at that school in Eugene, OR.
But I don't teach there no more.
After seven years of drudging I broke camp and started trudging
To a governmental posting in the Beltway corridor
In my quest for veneration I gave cash from my foundation
To whoever kissed my butt the most for funding their new score
"It's for science!" they would cry as they would pucker up once more
Here's your check, chump; there's the door.
Honorable mention to Fatwa for "Scary little Frischmas"
Have yourself a scary little Frischmas
Let teh crazy flow
Boot your Dell
And then uncork a nice bordeaux
Have yourself a scary little Frischmas,
Post teh crazy verse.
From now on your troubles
Will be getting worse
There you blog up in Orrey Gun
Hope you're having fun, you loon
Threaten those whom you're snarking at
And keep barking at the moon.
Through the years, you've burned all of your bridges
And it's all YOUR fault
Tenure track positions you've blown; oy gevalt!
By threat'ning 2-year-olds with sexual assault.
Thanks to everyone for voting and posting the work!
Until next Frischmas Eve!